 Consider the paradox that is the human mind. Humans have the ability to create and dream. To spin infinite realities in their minds. Yet that same brain that impacts how big we dream is often the very thing that sabotages those dreams. If you could do anything for work, what would it be? I mean anything? It might be that thing that your 10 year old self inspired to be. Or something new may have caught your eye as you matured in your career. What do you want to do next?! OK - write it down. Look at it. And pause for a moment. Now, I dare you to push yourself to dream bigger…. unapologetically prioritize your desires, needs, and dreams as you consider this next move. What does that look like? Write it down. What is your brain doing right now? Is it mocking this idea? Is it telling you all of the reasons why you can do this thing? Is it reminding you of the time you tried (and failed) to do this thing? Maybe you are committed to doing this thing and have already started the transition to doing it. But progress has been slow…really slow. You know you are capable of achieving big things, but somehow you can’t seem to get there. Here are 5 common traps that may have you in their grasp. The Comfort Zone Trap Shaking up the status quo on the way to doing big things is HARD. And when we deviate from the ‘norm,’ our brain is going to let us know. It generates all of the anxiety and fear - of financial insecurity, the unknown, of judgment, failure, and just plain old discomfort. When we cling to what is ‘safe,’ prioritizing short-term comfort, we stay stagnant, sacrifice long-term fulfillment and sometimes even financial security. Escape the Trap: Do hard things on a regular basis. Show your brain who is boss. What are you going to do today to step out of your comfort zone? The Perfectionism Paradox When we leap into the unknown of going after a big dream – there are going to be a lot of things that we have to learn along the way. Are you stuck at the start line because of a need to develop a flawless plan before you even start? This delays action and prolongs dissatisfaction in their current situation. Escape the Trap: Start taking steps, you can course correct along the way. Surround yourself with people who have done or are doing similar things. Learn from their mistakes and accelerate your progress. The 'Can't Let Them Down' Cycle Are you prioritizing other people’s needs before your own? Do you tell yourself “If I leave, everything will fall apart. They rely on me - I can’t just abandon them? It would be selfish for me to say out loud - I want to make a lot of money! I want people to like me.” It is time to stop carrying the burden of feeling indispensable to an employer, your family, or anyone else. You deserve this girl. Go get it! Escape the Trap: Being helpful does not have to equal sacrificing your dreams. Empower others to be capable and move on. Isn't it about time that you built your own dream instead of someone else's? Imposter Syndrome Loop You feel excited in a way that you have not felt in a long time. “It is just perfect.” This job listing is at your dream company. It is a title you have held before. You are ready to apply, but then you read down further. “Oh I don’t have that skill. I’ve never worked on that platform. I’ve never managed a budget that big!” Before long you have convinced yourself that you are not good enough or qualified enough to even apply! “Who am I to think I can do this?” Take bold steps toward your next big thing and remember whether you believe you can or you believe you cannot, you are right. Escape the Trap: Focus on the things that you CAN do. Know that you will upskill along the way, connect with a mentor, and surround yourself with people who believe in you. The Overwhelm Overload The dream is right there, you can almost touch it. You can see the steps. ALL of them. The plan comes together and you start making lists. One task leads to another and another - suddenly the plan has expanded. And soon you find yourself so far in the weeds – it is too much. “I can’t do all of this. What if I do all of this and still fail?” Your brain is trying to protect you - this is uncomfortable. It fights back by ensnaring you in the other traps! Anyone would feel overwhelmed. Escape the Trap: Take one step at a time. One day at a time. When hit with additional inspiration, put a pin in it. Focus on the plan. Be realistic about your timeline and ditch the perfectionism. Does this step need 110% effort, or can it just be done… When we dare to unapologetically prioritize our desires, needs, and dreams in our work, our brains push back. Disrupting the status quo sets off alarm bells. And your brain is going to scream at you with doubts, fears, excuses. It thinks that it is keeping you safe. Safe and stuck! Recognizing these traps is the first step to realizing your big dreams. Would you like to arm yourself with tools that build the mental resilience to not only get you through tough things, but result in sustained change so that you can do even bigger things next time? If you’re ready to strengthen your mental fitness, crush those traps and self-sabotage, and move forward with confidence, I invite you to join one of my upcoming mental fitness cohorts. Stand by other women who, like you, are determined to do big things in their lives—and together, we’ll learn to live life on your own terms while leaving a lasting legacy to inspire future generations. I invite you to join me at my upcoming summit where you can: Learn proven strategies to overcome self-sabotage and build resilience Learn actionable techniques to boost emotional intelligence and leadership skills Build sustainable habits to eliminate burnout and achieve work-life balance Don't miss this opportunity to transform your life and career in 2025! Secure your spot now and get ready to make 2025 your best year yet! January 28, 29, 30th, 2025 Same time each day: Noon PT/1:00 p.m. MT/2:00 p.m. CT/3:00 p.m. ET Grab your seat here: https://www.pqamplified.com/empower
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 When my dad called me and asked me to come in mid August, neither of us had a clue as to what was coming. I booked a one-way ticket and made the 1,000-mile trip. As I settled into my seat on the plane, a profound wave of gratitude washed over me. Over the past three years, I have redefined what work means to me. It wasn’t an easy journey. My work, deliberately crafted around my passions and purpose while working on my own terms. Now I was reaping the benefits of that decision, supporting my dad during a time when he needed me most.
My dad’s story is not unique. Many of my peers share similar stories about their aging parents. “Stubborn, hanging on by their fingernails. Living alone in a home that no longer meets their needs.” Dad’s mobility, balance, and stamina had been decreasing with each passing month. He knew that he needed support, to live, to make a decision about what came next. For 10 days, I supported him. No decisions were made—until a health crisis forced one. Dad spent 21 days in the hospital, then 30 days in a rehab facility, then onto the next “temporary” home. I have spent 8 weeks over 2 trips with Dad. I am heading back again in a few days. During those long hospital days, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t feel moments of frustration. I worried about my business. I had to cancel meetings, miss events, and set aside projects. My last blog post was early August—a stark reminder of how life had shifted. Yet, I allowed myself to feel those emotions before summoning gratitude. Because deep down, I knew there was no other place I was meant to be. This is why I redefined my career—so I could show up fully for the people and moments that matter most. I built a career that aligns with my life, not the other way around. And that’s exactly what I want for you. So many women I speak with dream of a career that allows them to be exactly where they want to be, when they want to be there. Some may feel stuck, undervalued, or unfulfilled in their careers. Others may be facing a big life transition such as divorce or empty nesting, and want to build meaningful work, but keep the autonomy and flexibility they have grown accustomed to. I invite you to join me to redefine what work means to you and create a career that aligns with your values, passions, and purpose. Building a career that fits your life starts with clarity—understanding your vision, your priorities, and your non-negotiables. Here are three key steps to help you begin: 1. Declare It’s Time for a Change It’s time to take control. Start by asking yourself: “What do I truly want from my work and my life?” “What do I need out of my work?” “What are my non-negotiables?” Give yourself permission to dream without judgment or limits. 2. Envision Your Ideal Work-Life Blend What does a career on your terms look like? It may start with an employee job to give yourself the runway to build a portfolio career that blends part-time work, consulting, passion projects, and entrepreneurship. Perhaps it’s transitioning into an encore career that leverages your expertise in a meaningful new way. The possibilities are endless when you redefine work on your terms. 3. Take the First Step—Even If It’s Small Change can feel overwhelming, but progress starts with one small step. Maybe it’s exploring your options, reaching out to a mentor, or having a conversation with me. Momentum builds confidence. My mission is to inspire women to disrupt traditional career paths and build lives by design – so you can be exactly where they’re meant to be, when you’re meant to be there. If you’re ready to reimagine what work can look like for you, I invite you to hop on my calendar. Let’s chat! https://calendly.com/mariadastur/30-minute-exploration-session #career #over40 #midlife #divorce #emptynesting #layoff #getajob #promotion #careervision #coach #CareerTransformation #NewBeginnings #mindset #caregiving #sandwichgeneration #richlife #lifevision  Have you been thinking about this career pivot for a while? Maybe you explored positions within your company? Did some research about opportunities beyond what you are doing now. Or even sent out a few applications here and there - “putting the feelers out” How long ago was that. How long have you been aware that it is time for the next big move in your career? What is the hold up?
It is human nature to start and stop, start and stop, when reaching for a goal. Especially when navigating toward a big goal. Some of us have been soaring in our careers and are reaching for higher highs. Some are ready to define our next career move on our own terms. Others may find themselves motivated to take action from a place of discomfort or desperation - or the NEED for more. I am going to assume that you have already done the work and are clear on your goal. And if you are not, then start there. WHAT is it you want and WHY do you want to get there? If you are struggling with answering these questions, then read my earlier post: Designing Your Dream Career. On the super hard days, when you are facing rejection after rejection, remembering your WHY goes a long way in helping you find that resilience to keep on going. We've all been there, when the exhilaration of a new idea, the vision of the possibility makes us feel invincible. The spark ignites a fire within us, pushing us to take those tentative first steps toward our goals, excited about a new side hustle, or going after a promotion or job. And when we hit that first set of roadblocks and the spark goes out. When faced with adversity it is human to go back to what you know, to what is safe, no matter how uncomfortable it is. At some point you get excited about reaching toward the goal again. And you take some tentative steps in that direction. You put yourself out there. And then rejection comes and the cycle begins again. Start, stop, start, stop. How will you feel a year from now if nothing changes in your professional life? What can you do to rewrite your career story? Be it until you become it - inside and out! But how? Step 1: Change your Environment The environment that got you to where you are today isn’t the environment that is going to get you to this next place. Have you ever heard the concept that people rise to the level of the 5 people that you spend the most time with? How can you surround yourself with people who are going to lift you up and open new doors for you? Who can accelerate your progress because they have already traveled this road? Who can hold you accountable? What events can you attend, virtually and in-person? Build a strong support network. Changing your external environment is half the battle. Next look inward. When those hurdles or rejection come, what is the narrative in your head? Are you feeling some imposter syndrome? Imposter syndrome is self-sabotage. These messages have been ingrained in your brain, sometimes since childhood. Learning how to rewire these pathways, to change the messages that your brain believes to be true is going to take some work. Question what you “know to be true.” Who told you that you are not good at math. Who told you that people who look like you do not do this? Who told you that you were not good enough? Why do you continue to give them power? Step 2: Explore Opportunities and Develop Skills Have you considered that another big reason that you are stuck is - you have no idea what is out there and what it would take to get it. You might be thinking, "I don't know what else I can do" or "I don't have the right skills." By changing your external and internal environment you will be exposed to new ideas and possibilities. You can also grow your career vision by researching new paths. Are there any industries, roles, and job listings that align with your interests, skills, and values? Let yourself dream again. What have you always wanted to do? Consider opportunities that could be accessed if you upskilled with a new certification or completed an optional project at work or through volunteer efforts. The most important thing is to get out and try new things to build your confidence. Step 3: Create an Action Plan When you are ready to take the next definitive steps toward your big career pivot, have a plan down to the day, and maybe even the half-hour if you like to keep a tight calendar. A clear plan will help you stay focused, motivated, and accountable - even on the hard days. What daily activities will get you to this goal? Don’t forget to include time to celebrate your wins. The path to a big goal is paved with dozens and dozens of intermediate benchmarks. Celebrate your progress and once in a while look back to see how far you have come. Navigating a career pivot of any type is HARD! But that shouldn’t be a reason to stop. By changing your environment, exploring new opportunities, and creating a clear action plan, you're poised to break free from the start, stop, start, stop cycle of self-doubt and stagnation. Go ahead and take the leap. And if you find yourself needing to ‘phone a friend,’ I am ready to take your call. Let’s leap ahead together and watch your career transform as you build your rich life by design.  The years in the trenches as a parent/caregiver/spouse, especially when you are the default person in charge, has a way of overwriting all previous programming. Raising kids, running a household, being a caregiver, is only accomplished through the magic of daily repeated patterns. Days and weeks can feel like the same reel playing over and over, stuck in a loop! Our brains rely on autopilot, because it uses less energy than actually thinking. And 2, 4, 6, 10+ years later you may find that you have morphed into a completely unrecognizable person that has lost traction in their career and no longer knows what you want!
It is completely normal to default into looking for that next step in the career pathway that you set in motion when you rolled into adulthood. It makes the most sense. You received training or went to college and did the thing for 10, or 20 or more years. Even if you are coming back from a GAP it makes sense to pick up where you left off. Or does it? What would happen if you paused to consider.
If the answer to these questions is no, it is time for a new perspective on your career. And to get there you first must STOP and consider the possibilities. Dare to Dream! Hold up. I can already hear your objections. Maria, I don’t have time for this dream job stuff. I need a job NOW - I do not have time to do this dream job stuff!!! I have a family to support. I can’t start over! What if I am not good enough? I am too old. I am afraid. When you give into that voice in your head and hurry or settle into your next ‘thing’ whether that is because it is what we know, it is safe, forcing a FIT — there is a good chance you will end up right back here 6-12 months from now. Beat down, broken, and looking for another THING. Pushing you further and further away from living that life by design. Or worse, you are going to grit it out and increase your stress and trigger that cascade of things (disordered sleep, high blood pressure, poor eating, loss of connections, anxiety/anger/depression, you know this spiral) that lead to health problems and decreased healthspan and a decreased life span. This scenario is certainly not part of your dream future! When we build our life by design, defining your career is a big piece of the puzzle. A career pivot is not just about landing your next job or launching a new venture. It's about taking deliberate steps that move you closer to the life you want to live – now and in the future. Do you choose to soar? Here are some tips on how you can open your eyes to the possibilities.
It is FINALLY your time to redefine yourself and consider where you are going in your life and how your career can support that vision. Work to live your life by design! Are you committed to taking the next steps? I am happy to collaborate and excited to share in your journey.  Are you standing at a career crossroads, wondering if it's finally your turn to build the fulfilling career you've always dreamed of? If you've spent years putting others first and now feel underemployed, underappreciated, or underpaid, you're not alone. My short career break turned into a 12 year career GAP after taking time to raise my 3 children and battle several rare and chronic diseases. When I was finally free to resurrect my career I felt completely lost! And let's face it, my brain was thinking all of the things. How do I look for a job? What if I'm not qualified? No one is going to want me after a 12 year ‘break.’ Of course it was anything but a break. Here is what I wish someone had told me. Dare to Dream Take a moment to really think about what you want to do! Understand Your Desires and Non-Negotiables It's time to put yourself first. Engage in self-reflection to define your true desires for both your career and life. Align your career goals with personal values and passions. Define your non-negotiables such as corporate culture, hours, pay, location, etc. You must define what you want before you try to go out and land it! Set Your Intention for This Journey Mindset is 90% of a career pivot! Define the timeline and steps for your career transformation. Identify potential sources of resistance to change and introduce strategies to overcome them. Foster a mindset shift towards positive transformation, recognizing that change is a powerful force for growth and fulfillment. Create Your Personal Brand Yes, you are a brand. And now that you know exactly what you are seeking in this next career pivot, you need to get the word out. Write your unique value proposition and then align all of your brand assets including your resume, cover letters, LinkedIn profile, and portfolio. Learn how to articulate who you are and what problems you solve for elevator pitches and interviews. Start to Lay Your Career Search Path Whether it's a job, a job combined with a side gig, or the beginning of an entrepreneurial venture, start laying the framework for your desired career path. What pieces need to be set up first? Create a plan and break it down into weekly action steps. With a clear understanding of your desires, strengths, and a well-defined framework, you are ready to go out there and build your career. If you're ready to take the leap, grab your FREE "5 Steps to Monetizing Your Brilliance” workbook. And if you're truly ready to move now, connect with me for a one-on-one conversation. Click here to access my calendar. You’ve done the grind, you’ve done the time, it is time to live your life by design! |
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